Dear 30-something Dating newbie,
Do you remember when you were a teen and dating involved those silly little games, someone else telling you they wanted you to date their friend because he had a crush on you? How about the fact that they wanted to break up with you because your hair was too long/short/dark/light? Forget about it…. You’re an adult now, you are in your mid-30’s, you might have a family or finally see a break in your career. You might have just come out of a 10+ year marriage and you are looking toward the idea of finding someone you want to spend time with.
So you start off where many people start. Craigslist, Nothing against the site, when it comes to finding an I-pod or a used fridge NOTHING beats it. When it comes to finding love, it might be a little difficult to shuffle through the spam and filth to get a person that’s worth dating. If you want funny stories, it’s the way to go!
Regardless whether you get a site you pay-for, one for free or have a large group of friends that set you up on blind dates all the time, there are a few things to remember.
· You don’t NEED to date. You WANT to date. There is a huge difference mentally between these two words. Make sure the man knows this before going into it.
· If you have kids, be careful. Research the man; don’t introduce the kids too soon.
· Be honest, totally honest. Put up a recent picture… if you don’t want to date someone of a certain race, religion, zodiac sign, etc, make note of it in your head. That way you can search using the right parameters.
· Don’t expect to find “Romeo”… expect to find YOUR Mr. Now.
· If there is no “magic”, no “spark”, don’t let it go too far and/or end it soon. It’s not worth leading someone on or rolling your eyes on a phone call when you can happily move on and find someone else to spend time with.
Just have fun! It’s not all about how many dates you can get, playing games or being bored with someone who’s cute but has no substance. We are older now, we don’t want to “raise” a husband, and we want a grown man. Once you find one, you’ll hang up your dating gloves forever!!
~Just as a side note: I found my guy on PlentyofFish.com after taking a year and a half off dating to “get my head on straight”. I was a single Mom of 6 kids and now am getting married in 34 weeks! I was not paid by Craigslist or PlentyofFish.com to write this, I am just writing from experience~