Friday, June 12, 2009

What if....

.... You knew it was your time?

If you were sitting in a bed with crisp, cold sheets and the sad eyes of your doctor telling you...

"There is nothing we can do." and "I am so sorry."

You go home and start writing letters, making phone calls, cleaning out drawers and making plans for your passing.

I wouldn't want to write letters or make phone calls or clean out my life.

I wouldn't want to say goodbye over 1000 miles away from my childhood friend, Mandy OR tell my aunts and uncles in New York that I will never see them again.

This story is what I would want... the laughter, the tears, the memories... I don't want a funeral of people crying in a stark building. I want the air hitting their face and feeling ME around them.

Before I go, if I am blessed enough to know the end is coming... I want to dictate MY ending, dictate MY wishes... and depart this life on my terms... It's my last rebellion.

6 comments:

Nydia said...

Omg ... I'm crying all over the place here ... that was the kind of beauty and sadness that is indescribable in words ...

I don't know that I would've had the strength to do participate in a celebration such as the beautiful one Babs had ...

May she rest in peace ...

erin said...

Thank you so much for your sweet comment on my blog regarding Bab's and thank you for sharing her beautiful story with your readers..

warmly,
erin

Miranda said...

Can we go sky diving?

-Mandy

Lilith Silvermane said...

Mandy... Only if I can have a party before hand! :)

Joanna said...

I wouldn't want to know...I have already discussed this with family members and Zack. If I am dying, I don't want to know...That news changes everything.

russ said...

You make me weep.