Socially awkward, he always spoke too loud and wore clothes that rarely matched,
but I never missed a chance to hear him tell us a story about the Indians he spent years researching.
Seven languages, he's climbed some of the worlds tallest mountains, hockey player, survivor of polio, adopting father of three children, world traveler and an ex-priest.
He has lived more life that most men I know, He has written five books and even now, a harsh critic can bring him to his knees.
I rarely saw my father cry. If I did, it was because of something one of us kids did. A mistreatment of my mother or him, or worse, to each other.
I have disagreed with him for years, though still loved him with a depth I will rarely be able to explain. I have hated him at times, even when I knew I was in the wrong.
So tonight I am sitting here finally understanding the emotions that have been swirling around in my head and my heart. He is going in tomorrow to find out if he has colon cancer.
I told him a few years ago that he had to wait until I was old enough to handle his death, I told him that he had to hold on because I wasn't ready. I don't think we are all ever ready to lose a parent.
9 comments:
Aw sorry to hear that. He shall be in my thoughts. My father died a day after my twin sister and I turned 8. This year marks the 25th anniversary of his death. It is still hard without him here, without him seeing me grow into the man I have become. My mom raised 4 kids all by herself. She is one of the strongest women I know.
Oh Lilith... I do hope things go well for you father, keep us posted. But I agree and I know very well about it, unfortunately that it's hard to deal with losses when they happen with people we dearly love.
Keep the faith, if your dad really has colon cancer in its first stages, there are so much that can be done to help him fully recover, specially if he's a strong man. He'll be in my thoughts & prayers.
Kisses and bright blessings from Nydia.
You've got my prayers...I know your feelings all too well. ((hugs))
... And I tagged you!
Kisses!
I came by to say thanks for stopping by my bloggy giveaway. But after that beautiful post about your father I have to also say that I will say a prayer for your father.
I'll be thinking of you honey *hugs*
This made me cry...
http://elislids.blogspot.com/
What a wonderful post to honor your father. He sounds like an amazing person. I hope things turned out well at the Dr. How did it go?
I came by to tell you to come on over and enter my giveaway...
http://thewholefamily1.blogspot.com/2008/10/water-but-waaay-cuter.html
That sucks. I can't say stuff about my dad. just can't.
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